Are You Listening?

We have more communications methods today than ever before. We have smart phones, dumb phones, Facebook, Twitter, and on and on. Yet with all the technology we really don’t communicate well. The great missing element is our lack of the ability to listen. Listening personalizes what is a very impersonal communication world.

It’s really no mystery why we aren’t good at listening. In school we spend hours and hours learning to read, write, and even a good amount of time in speaking. Yet little time on the art of listening. In my own experience I have nearly 300 hours of college preparation that includes one, yes ONE hour devoted to listening. Most of us learned how to listen by trial and error.
So what’s the big deal? Why should we be concerned about becoming a good listener. It’s more fun to talk and let others be impressed with what we know. What are the benefits we gain from listening? I’m glad you asked! Let’s consider just four really large benefits of listening.

First, when we listen we build trust. Someone told me once “people don’t really care how much you know until they know how much you care.” When we listen we convey that we care and our caring builds the start of a level of trust. Trust is foundation of building upon a strong relationship. Solomon wrote that “for a man to have friends he must show himself friendly.” Listening is a great way to show ourselves friendly.

Next, listening enables learning. When we are talking we learn little, but listening helps us learn what others know and thus expand our information. By listening and asking questions we can learn great amounts. If we actually get into a conversation with two people listening the learning possibilities are endless. Sharing our knowledge expands both parties involved.

Third, listening facilitates understanding. Many of the current communication devices cause misunderstanding. Emails or texts often leave a false impression. You can’t tell if they’re smiling, scowling, or possibly upset. Listening enhances feedback and thus strengthens understanding. We have a better understanding of the message being conveyed when effective listening is practiced. When we understand each other our communications become more meaningful.

Finally, listening creates a connection. In the current world of virtual connection, we actually have little real connection. Listening creates a bond that connects us in a meaningful way into the future. Listening is the key to building a network that enhances both our personal and business relationships. When lasting connections are made everyone benefits. Are you listening?

November: The Month of Thanks

November seems to bring out some of the best in us. It seems we pause to be thankful more than at other times. We reflect on the early settlement and founding traditions of our great country. Sometimes we fall short in expanding our thought to other areas we have for being thankful. I’ll share a few of mine and hopefully spur your own reflections.

• Freedom to worship as I choose. No oppressive government telling me when and where and how I should worship the God I choose to serve. The founding fathers were clear in providing us the freedom of religion, not the freedom from religion. Others have the same freedom to make the same or different choices.

• Freedom to change the direction of our governance at the ballot box and not by armed force. We’ve had this right for over two hundred years and earlier this month once again witnessed our democracy in action. Other than an occasional glitch our election process runs relatively smoothly.

• The advantage of being born an American. What a privilege to be a native citizen of this great land. Our poorest are rich compared to the poor in other lands and yet our obligation is to care about and for our poor.

• The freedom to live where I choose. The only restrictions are my choice and my ability to support the choices I make. We have lived in several places and found good and bad in each one. How we have lived and been treated has been more about how we have responded rather than how others have responded to us.

• The freedom of choosing my life’s work. I am personally thankful to have had two very rewarding careers. Most of my life was spent in sales and marketing, while my latter years are blessed with the opportunity to teach and help develop others.

• The blessing of good health. We take this for granted until we look around and see the suffering of others. Age changes this and so it’s important that we take advantage of opportunities while we have this great asset.

• I’ve saved the best for last, I’m thankful for my wonderful family. My wife of 48years this month, Sharon, and three beautiful daughters, six grandchildren, and our extended family as well. I’m additionally thankful for my parents who loved and gave me everything I needed for a successful life.

So, those are just a few of mine. Now sit down and think of what you have to be thankful for. The list will be endless.

Where Are You Living?

I recently heard speaker and writer John Maxwell say that each of us “spend our lives either preparing or repairing.” The question I had for myself was “Where are you living?” I finally came to the conclusion that to be successful in any venture we must be continuously doing both. Preparing and repairing are a seemingly never ending cycle.

One of the most important activities in life is preparation. Since we have so many aspects to our lives, preparation seems to just go on and on. I often think of the old Boy Scout motto “Be prepared.” I was only a scout for a short period, but was an Eagle Scout counselor for a couple of years. The time I spent in scouting taught me the importance of preparation.

I can never really think about preparation without thinking of the first time I had a sales appointment with my Prudential Manager, Paul Hutsey. After about thirty or forty minutes of aimless wandering through a disorganized sales interview, we left without the sale. In the car Paul told me “adlibs are for amateurs” reinforcing once again the importance of preparation. I developed an organized sales presentation that could be adjusted to my potential audiences.

No matter how well one prepares most of the time adjustments must be made. Plans seldom work exactly as laid out. So then, the repairing begins. We revise the plan to fit the situation and often revise it several times. Over time, experience makes it so the repairs are smaller and shorter in duration. During the preparation stage we become able to anticipate potential roadblocks and have alternative plans to follow. We often prepare and repair at the same time.

An example of preparing and repairing is the script of plays that a football team has for its first couple of offensive series. If the plays are highly effective early, few adjustments (repairs) are made. If the team struggles with the early plays then more are used and maybe even additional plays added. Repairs are determined by the plans early success levels.

Years ago I heard someone say “poor planning prevents peak performance.” Sometimes poor planning is really just being unable or unwilling to make repairs to the plan as it goes off track. We get so invested in our idea that it is hard to change to an alternative. Subtle adjustments can make a faltering plan achieve our desired results. It’s all in the understanding of the importance of preparing and then repairing!

What's Your Brand?

In the earlier history of our country branding became an important aspect. Cattle were hog-tied and a permanent brand placed upon them to prove where they belonged. The brand protected the owner from rustlers trying to encroach upon another’s property. Although not nearly as physically painful, branding and protecting our brand is still important in today’s society.

Branding identifies who we are, what our culture is and what we do. Branding becomes how we are known to others. Every person or organization is identified by certain qualities or characteristics. Considerable time and money is spent establishing and maintaining the brand. In 2012, and for the ninth year in a row, Proctor and Gamble spent more on advertising than any other company with $3 billion spent. The company started in 1837 and is well-known and yet continues identifying and protecting their brand. Three activities are essential for success in branding; we’ll explore each of them.

First we must pick what our brand will be. How do we want to be known? What is important to us? What are the qualities necessary to be successful? We will live with these choices throughout our lives or careers so care needs to be taken. It is important to choose well because the brand we communicate tends to stick with us: positively or negatively.

Second, we must consistently exhibit the qualities and characteristics chosen. These will be how we are identified to our friends or customers. We want these to stick so this is how we’ll be known and come across. They should accurately reflect who we are or where we are trying to go. We should try to remove any guesswork and have a clear picture of who we are and what we want to become.

Finally, once the brand is fine-tuned we must continuously protect our brand. Part of the protection is to be true to the characteristics chosen as important and also flexible enough when times or conditions warrant changes. Deviation from the brand can be devastating and confuse those around us. Not recognizing changing times can also hurt. Sears was late in reacting to Wal-Mart’s variety of product selection in their stores and fell from being the nation’s number one retailer.

We live with our brand for a long time. Research shows that people often spend more time planning a two week vacation than establishing a plan (brand) for their lives or careers. Rather than a hit or miss approach we need a plan for our brand!!
Contact Chuck at: chuck.wright@sckans.edu

Life's Certainties

All the time I was growing up I remember hearing that only two things were certain in life: death and taxes. My insurance career has taught me that death is truly certain; my observations in life have taught me taxes, not so much. Many don’t pay taxes, many avoid paying taxes, some evade paying taxes, and a few even go to jail for not paying taxes. Is there then just one certainty in human life, namely death?

It seems to me that at there are at least three other certainties in life. We will explore those and try to see how overcoming each of them will make life much more pleasant. Our contribution to our society and even our personal success is impacted by how we face these issues so let’s begin our discussion.

CERTAINTY #1: IF YOU DON’T GO AFTER WHAT YOU WANT, YOU’LL NEVER GET IT!! Someone has written “he (or she) who hesitates is lost.” Unfortunately some not only hesitate, but they never start. Others get into the start-stop routine and barely ever get past starting. When we have decided what we want the next step is to go for it! We fear failure, and yet, failing to try assures failure. John Greenleaf Whittier had it right when he wrote that the saddest words were “it might have been.”

CERTAINTY # 2: IF YOU DO NOT ASK THE ANSWER WILL ALWAYS BE NO!! My insurance career proved that to me early. My manager Paul Hutsey told me that asking and getting a no brought me to closer to the next yes. Yes answers were what made the difference so just ignore the nos and move on!! Jesus Himself agreed with this when He said “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you” in Matthew 7:7.

CERTAINTY #3: IF YOU DON”T PUT ONE FOOT FORWARD YOU WILL ALWAYS BE IN THE SAME PLACE!! As the Chinese proverb says, “the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” This is closely related to the first certainty, but a little different. This one is more directed toward our “comfort zone” and realizing that life’s adventure is in exploring new places, thoughts, or ideas. Adjustments may have to be made along the way, but life’s joy is about the journey, not the destination!

We will all face each of the certainties many times in various aspects of our lives. In order to succeed (or fail) in life depends upon how we handle the encounters.

Hall's Cough Drop Motivators

From almost the beginning of my sales career, I was told to use motivators to keep going towards various goals. My early career with Combined Insurance Company used many motivators including “Do It Now,” “What the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve,” and “With every adversity there is a seed of equivalent benefit.” There were many more! These were to foster what Combined founder, W. Clement Stone, called PMA or Positive Mental Attitude.

Early in the year when colds and the flu were going around I developed a cough. I began to use Hall’s cough drops to lessen the cough’s effect. As I unwrapped one of the small yellow drops I noticed small print on the package. Each time I used a cough drop I noticed a different saying. By the time my cough and sore throat subsided, twelve different motivators were identified. They were all good, but five stood out to me.

“The show must go on!” No matter how much we would sometimes like to quit many others are depending upon us. Each family member makes an important contribution, and the family wouldn’t be the same without them. In the business setting, we each have others depending upon us to do our part. The show must go on; so let’s carry our share of the load.

“Be resilient!” Life has its ups and downs and we can learn from every stage that we go through. Many have stopped just short of success; so if we persist, we improve our chances. Babe Ruth struck out over 2,200 times; but because he was resilient, returned to the plate and hit 714 home runs in the dead- ball era.

“Get back in there!’ Closely related to being resilient and yet we all can relate to how hard it is to keep trying when we have failed at something. One common theme of most success stories I have read is that they all had one or many failures. The separation point is another Combined motivator, “Success is attained by those who try and keep trying.” They got back in there!!

“March forward!” The closest path between two points is a straight line towards the second point. Retreats mean ground has to be covered twice or more. Even small steps in the right direction are progress.

”It’s yours for the taking!” Most of the time we are in competition with ourselves to achieve some desired result. Indecision is the main culprit. As my old Prudential manager, Paul Hutsey, used to say, “Getting what we want is not the problem, its deciding what we want that that stops us. We just need to remember that it’s ours for the taking!!!!

Being Methodical!!

I’ve often heard people say “If only I could do that as well as he (or she) does.” They want the result without putting in the time to develop the skill. People often start a project or desire a skill only to bet bored along the way and move on to something else and something else and something else…………….

Those developing great skills and accomplishing great things are good at the art of being methodical. When others get bored and quit, successful people trudge on. Being methodical develops consistency. In fact, being methodical develops consistency at high levels. Jackie Stiles, the Claflin High School and Missouri State basketball star made 1,000 shots a day before she went on to other activities. Her shooting skills were rarely matched due to her consistency of methodical practice.

Having a plan for improvement every day is a second aspect of being methodical. Often we want to achieve or master something but forget or ignore the steps to getting where we want. Having a routine and sticking with it yields small victories and ultimately the results we desire. Watching a successful professional golfer, we see a repetitive routine that can even seem boring, but yields muscle memory that produces exact or near exact results every time.
Working the routine eventually yields dependability. Many can do a great thing one time, or even a few times. The plan and its repetitiveness make it possible to replicate performance over and over and over again. Organizations need people that can perform at a high level and can do it repeatedly.

Distractions are bound to happen as we move towards our goal. Where we can it is important to remove unwanted distractions. While we cannot always eliminate the distraction we must learn how to handle them and keep moving forward. Some distractions even relax us and make our mind sharp and better prepared to continue. It is important that we get back to our routine and let it take us to our destination.

Accomplishing superior performance is often a lonely task. There must be an understanding that not many will choose to stay with a program. The last two lines of Robert Frost’s poem “The Road Less Traveled” fits well here. “I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.” Being methodical is “a road less traveled” and those making that choice can accomplish anything! Which road we take does make a difference!

5 C's for Success!!

For the first time in several years I was asked to teach the Corporate Finance course for Southwestern College this fall. As I prepared I was reminded of the 5 C’s of credit that banks and other financial institutions use to determine credit worthiness of potential clients. The 5 C’s of credit are character, capital, capacity, conditions, and collateral. Success in life or in the business world also has 5 C’s. We’ll take some time and visit about the 5 C’s of success.

First, in order to succeed in the long term we must realize that each day is a series of choices. Ultimately those choices determine who we are and what we do in life. While some choose to study and work to get ahead others choose a recreation priority. Our great country has attempted to provide equal opportunity, we have mistaken that to include equal outcome. Outcomes are determined by the choices made when given opportunity.

The second key to success is becoming consistent in applying the things we learn and the experiences we have gained. To be able to perform something well once is not enough. We must practice until performance at a high level is a repetitive almost monotonous activity. Consistency in performance is developed by good habits: good habits are developed by finding successful methods and using them over and over.

Communication is the third C on the journey to success. We can never rest and think that our individual or corporate communication has arrived. Having worked with approximately twenty companies of various sizes in my consulting business yielded one thing they each had in common. No matter how well they appeared to communicate, a company survey always revealed a need for communication to be improved.

The day of the “lone wolf” is almost gone in our society. The need for our fourth C, collaboration, becomes more important as time goes by. Little is accomplished today by singleness of effort. In families, businesses, churches, and schools much can be gained by working together. Collaborative effort makes possible Steven Covey’s “third alternative” where two or more people come together with ideas that are blended into a superior final consensus that can be used and adjusted where necessary.

Effective use of the first four C’s positions an organization or an individual to be successful in using the final C, making a contribution. That contribution can be to our family, our company, or even to our society but it becomes much larger than it might have been. Ultimately we are largely judged by the contribution we make to the organizations we align ourselves with. By keeping in mind and developing the C’s of success we can maximize our contribution to the causes we choose as worthy of our time.

Longevity: A Real Benefit!

September is usually a great time of the year. It starts getting cooler, football begins in earnest, and the holidays are just around the corner. This year September started as usual and then a visit to my dentist changed everything. After completing my filling Dr. Tonk Mills said he had decided to retire in December. He was a little sorry since on June 13, 2013 we could have celebrated fifty years together.

What are the benefits of a doctor- patient association of fifty years? I could count on Dr. Mills to give me recommendations and often choices for my dental care. On all but one occasion I took his advice. Once he said I should have a root canal but I chose to remove the tooth. Years later after three root canals I realize his advice should have been followed.. We both enjoy golf, so the years have provided discussions of his trips to Scotland and our adventures on the course. We’ve talked about playing a round, but it never came about. Maybe it will since we both have more time on our hands.

Years ago I gave Dr. Mills a copy of my book “Thinking Out of the Box” and he commented upon it several times also sharing it with his employees. He has encouraged me about the book many times. On this occasion, our last as Doctor-patient, he said he was sharing the book with his grandson in Kansas City. The grandson was starting his career in business. Sharing the eleven year old book was just another example of encouragement coming as a result of our relationship’s longevity.
In our modern organizations longevity yields benefits also. There is always a place for new people and new ideas, but the contribution of veterans is immeasurable. The longer term employees tend to be the “go to people” that can be counted upon to lead in time of crisis. In his book “Leadership is An Art” writer Max DePree identifies tribal storytelling as the art of moving myths, legends, and values of the company forward to the next generation and it is absent without longevity.

Early in my insurance career I had great managers and training that helped me launch my career. In addition our office had over fifteen people with over twenty years with the company. We used to have a joke that it depended whether someone had thirty years of experience or one year of experience thirty times. The ones making use of and sharing their experiences were invaluable. Hours in the office with those veterans added a great deal to my individual growth. Without the experiences of those with significant longevity my development would have been much slower.

Oh by the way, happy retirement Dr. Mills!

All Show, No Go!!

One of the most important determinants of leadership success is the character of the leader. Much of our society looks for the charisma of the leader. Both are important qualities but given the chance to pick only one, character will win the day.

Leaders of character say and do right things. The world is full of people who talk a good game. Unfortunately, they are often all show and no go. Some of the most charismatic of leaders collect a following but fail to follow through. Finally they end up losing their following.

Sometimes a charismatic leader tries to take advantage of his or her ability and tries to baffle others with talent. In the short run this often works but only builds up more disappointment when the character flaws become apparent.

Character stands the leader in good stead over the long haul. Someone has said that character is who you are when no one is looking. I think the statement is true but doesn’t totally define a person of character. So what are some of the things a person of character says and does that are right?

Persons of character spend time determining right things and then stand upon them no matter the consequence. They do not blow with the wind or go for the flavor of the month. In our modern society there is value in flexibility but not when it comes to compromising one’s governing values. Persons of character stand for something rather than fall for anything.

Persons of character are loyal. Loyalty can be shown in supporting a subordinate, but also in having the courage to be honest and tell another when they are wrong or have made a mistake. Too often in the business world, people go along to get along and so honest evaluation with the intent of remediation is absent. Persons without character would rather be liked than to take care of a job’s toughest tasks.

Finally, persons of character are consistent. They become very predictable. After subordinates have been with a leader of character for a while they can almost always guess how the leader will respond in situations. This consistency builds the foundation for relationships to develop. No guessing and fearing how the leader might react when things don’t go well or when they do go well.

When we are given the opportunity to choose a leader with both character and charisma that would contain the best of both worlds. However, given the choice of one or the other, character should win out every time. With that choice we have a lot of go and not just show.

The Cycle of Life

As it is with most things the journey through life is cyclic. Business goes through cycles of ups and downs, booms and busts, in order to become successful. In our personal life we also go through cycles of feast and famine to get to the magic time: retirement. In order to successfully complete life, three distinct phases must be mastered and ultimately completed.

First, comes the learning phase. Formal learning starts at five or six; but in reality, learning starts long before school days. Children learn from parents, siblings, and others. Some of the learning is instructional, but much of it is by observation. School broadens both academic and social learning and hopefully produces a balanced individual, ready to make his or her mark on society.

At the other end, formal education often ends at 18, 22, or 25, but to be continually successful a person must become a lifelong learner. Part of lifelong learning is gaining some additional information, but most of it is applying what we have learned to the vocation we have chosen and to enhance the relationships we enter over the years of life.

Next, comes the earning phase. We enter a workforce where we are told we are under qualified and often have times later when we are overqualified. In between are the years we accumulate things, raise a family, and hopefully set aside for later years. Building a career and chasing children activities dominate this second phase of life. We often catch ourselves coming and going in order to juggle the various duties.

Late in the earning stage as children start on their own earning quest, we begin to enter the final phase of life as we begin to return some of what we have gained in the earning stage. The returning phase is different for different people. It might be serving in the PTO or helping with service projects for the Rotary. Returning could be running for public office or making a contribution to the local college. Communities are made stronger by the volunteer efforts of those in the returning stage.

As children have left the learning phase and entered the earning stage, parents have more time and resources to return to the community for what the community has given them. This cycle has worked for decades in our society; and yet in recent years, we have seen a decline in participation in groups and organizations that foster returning phase activities. Hopefully we will see volunteerism grow and be healthy again as we move into the future. The cycle must continue in order for our learning and earning phases to stay healthy.

Work Smarter, Not Harder

For almost as long as I can remember I have heard the terminology “work smarter, not harder” and as I matured in my various roles I could see how I might employ the strategy. Early in my career I spent many hours working, but much of the time I was spinning my wheels and not getting much done. It occurred to me that there must be a better way, and so I gained advice from those seeming to accomplish much more with their efforts.

One of the first aspects of “working smarter, not harder” was to plan my work. Knowing where you are going saves a lot of time in the long run. The second half of planning is that once work is planned to then work the plan. Someone else improved upon this advice by telling me to work when you’re working and play when you are playing. Both are important, but should be separate activities and seldom mixed.

Understanding an application of the Pareto principle is also important. That is, that 80% of your results come from 20% of your efforts, or 80% of your problems come from 20% of your clients. When this is well understood effort can be made to focus on productive areas and spend less, but necessary, time on less productive ventures.

Learn to say “No.” You could live to be a hundred and still not have time to do everything you want—that’s the curse and blessing of being intelligent and having high expectations of yourself. The good news is you can choose what to focus on. You have far more freedom than you may realize. Review everything in your life and ask, “What’s the worst that can happen if I stopped doing this?” Saying “No” sometimes is the only way you can say “Yes” to what you really value.

Another aspect of “working smarter, not harder” is to avoid perfectionism. Perfectionism cripples us into redoing work repeatedly for that perfect result. The secret is there is generally no perfect result and the time spent seeking a perfect result could be better spent on other tasks. Perfectionists tend to employ “tunnel vision” and can’t do more than one task at a time. In our complex business and personal environment we must learn to multitask and live with several unfinished tasks in the process of moving towards completion.

Avoiding perfectionism will allow better use of another aspect of “working smarter, not harder” to take place. It will be easier to delegate some tasks to others when we know that some of their work will also not be perfect. Our attitude of “I can do it better” will be tempered to one of “I will have time for other important tasks.”

Finally, developing flexibility will help us to “work smarter, not harder.” Most of our plans, whether performed by us or others, will seldom go exactly as they were laid out. When problems arise adjustments will determine success. The more we anticipate the needs for adjustment, and possible diversions from, the more time we’ll have to accomplish the tasks.

Mentoring Revisited

Mentoring is a hot topic in the business world, as well as in many other areas of our society. It has become a real “buzz” word in the current business jargon. Much has been said and in many cases less has been done. I recently attended a men’s meeting with the men of our church. One of the topics was mentoring and I received a fresh perspective on the topic and how its success depends upon mastering four activities.

First of all we must give them a personal challenge. If they keep on doing what they’ve been doing they’ll keep on getting what they’ve been getting. When Vince Lombardi took over the Green Bay Packers in 1958 they had won thirty per cent of their games in the previous twelve seasons. Over the next nine years the Pack had nine winning seasons, won seventy-five per cent of their games, and five world championships (Including the first two Super Bowls). Lombardi challenged them to reach for their best and they set the standard of excellence in professional football.

Once the challenge has been given then the mentor must give the follower confidence. They must know we believe in them. Our confidence in them must be real, it must be given regularly, and it must be specific. It’s not just enough to say “good job”, we must let them know how they have succeeded and the behavior will be repeated. A great deal of our time must be spent wandering around finding them “doing something good.” As tasks are completed successfully we give larger assignments and thus build their confidence levels.

Bumps in the road will happen and when they do we must give them honest counsel. When we have worked successfully at building their confidence, they will be more receptive to our counsel. Our motives for counsel are really important at this point. A key question must be, “Am I correcting for my benefit or for their benefit?” When we have earned the right to correct we must make sure we apply the correction in an empathetic way. The human tendency is to be hard on others and easy on ourselves. It is important to think how we would like the matter handled if the roles were reversed.

An outcome of successful mentoring is to see growth. When growth is observed we should give sincere praise. When growth happens we practice the fourth activity of successful mentoring- giving them full credit. We can undermine the whole process by trying credit for their growth. We might have contributed, but they made it happen. Let them have their day in the sun. Our reward will be the increased performance received as a result of their growth.

Moving Upward and Onward!

The business world is full of people dreaming of moving up in their organization. Most have the desire and many have the ability, but lack of focus keeps many from succeeding. At the same time our organizations need to have people ready and willing to fill key positions. Being able to focus in four areas provides readiness for the position desired.

First, we must work hard to learn the fundamentals of our current position and the position we want. A successful manager once told me that being ready for a position and the position being available seldom happen at the same time. Therefore, we must be constantly working to develop and improve. Find out what people successful in jobs like we’re aiming for are doing and develop the skills even before we need them. Ask the employer/manager for advice in what additional abilities he or she sees essential for movement in their organization.

Second, once we have the skills we must continue to practice them. Often skills are developed and then not used, causing them to become dull. Feeling like we are treading water can cause complacency but it is important to stay sharp and look for new skills to incorporate into our practice. The difference between good and great is often the commitment to continued practice. Living on College Street I often see teams of runners out complying with their coaching instructions. At other times I see a mere handful (and sometimes just one) of the same people running on their own and making a commitment to being the best they can be.

Third, understand that even ultimate preparation doesn’t insure immediate ascension to the desired position. Paying the dues is difficult but it must be done. John Wooden, the legendary UCLA basketball coach, coached for over 20 years before winning a national championship and then won eleven championships in the next thirteen years. Paying the dues takes real personal mental toughness and persistence. Impatience can often cause people to quit, thus falling short of their desired promotion.

Finally, once a level of performance that gets recognition is attained it must be maintained. We have to keep it going. Others will probably want the same position we are seeking. We must give decision makers a value added that puts us at the top of the list. The more time we spend creating value the closer we move towards our goal. If we temporarily can’t move upward we can always move onward by continuous improvement. The Japanese system of kaizen (small continuous improvements) works well while waiting.

Life's Lessons!!

As we pass through life we learn many lessons. Some of us learn the lesson the first time; others take many times to finally “get it.” A wise man once said "If we don't learn from history, we are doomed to repeat it.” We’ve all done it both ways, but repeating the same mistakes can be both painful and, in many cases, expensive. I’ll take this opportunity to share a few of my life lessons with you. Maybe you can avoid some of the problems I’ve encountered.

• Haste makes waste: We live in a microwave society and the tendency is to rush everything. Experience has shown that doing and redoing is more expensive and time consuming than doing a job right in the first place. By being a little more deliberate we end up with more time for other important activities.

• Listen to the other side of the story: Sometimes people come to us with a story so well stated that we buy it to be the whole story. Painful experiences have taught that it always pays to get what Paul Harvey called “the rest of the story.” People see things from their perspective and it helps to get a broader view. The truth often lies somewhere in between the two positions.

• A big mouth doesn’t make a big person: Our society seems to value the outspoken and often just plain rude. While it is often nice to know where others stand, consideration should be given to the views and feelings of others. Being argumentative doesn’t really solve anything. Only time will prove a position to be right or wrong.

• When in doubt, don’t: My sixth grade teacher told me this when I was eleven. I’ve gone against the advice several times and lost each time. Her wisdom has been valuable to me for over fifty years. If you can’t get inner peace about a decision either delay it or go in a different direction.

• If you don’t stand for something you’ll fall for anything: We’ve become a nation of the wishy-washy and full of compromise on too many issues. My studies of both Scripture and the business world tell me that right is right and wrong is wrong. I know this isn’t a popular opinion among “gray area” types, but I’ll take solace in an old Winston Churchill quote,” You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.” Churches, civic clubs, and even employers struggle due to lack of commitment on the part of their members.


These are just a few of the lessons life has taught me. Some have been painfully learned over a long period of time, while others were easier to grasp and become part of my philosophy of life. When followed they have saved time and headaches.

The Market: In or Out?

Recent days have brought extreme volatility in the stock market. Almost daily people are asking the question, “Should I stay in or get out of the market?” The only sure thing right now is that if you had $100 invested two weeks ago you have about $85 now, if you decided to sell the shares. One basic maxim of the market is to buy low and sell high. In reality when either of those events happen it is for most people just guesswork. In order to have a chance to prosper in the market there are several proven principles that must be followed. When we allow the rules of the market to work and get professional advice we have the best chance for success.

RULE #1: Prior to investing have several months of income set aside in a low interest, accessible fund for emergencies. Murphy’s Law of investing is that when you have an emergency fund you seldom need it, but when you don’t things happen.

RULE#2: Be in the market for the long term. Short-term put-and-take investing yields losses and frustration. Long-term investment returns show gains larger than bonds or fixed interest products. The tendency, for many, when the market turns down is to panic and sell, thus assuring a loss.

RULE#3: Regularly invest an amount that is comfortable and realistic for your economic situation. Doing this takes advantage of a concept called “dollar cost averaging.” Which simply put is buying shares over an extended period of time at various rates thus pulling out the highs and the lows of the market.

RULE#4: Keep in mind that you haven’t gained or lost anything until you are at the point of selling. In 2008 my wife’s account lost about 35%, but we decided to keep investing on the hope of coming to a point of recovery. Fortunately, she recovered her losses and even had some gain. With our impending retirements we were no longer RULE#2 investors, so we moved her funds to a fixed interest account. We used Will Rogers famous quote, “I’m not so interested in the return on my money as I am the return of my money” to make our decision.

RULE#5: Balance risk and reward with your investment capacity. Most people really can’t afford high risk investment ventures because they really can’t afford the downside possibilities. The great percentage of investing comes in mutual funds there the risk and the return are both lower and diversification is achieved by the number of companies and industry sectors in the portfolio.

Life and Business Are a Lot Like Golf

Over the past 20 years a lot of my leisure time has been spent at Quail Ridge Golf Course. It occurs to me that success in life or business is similar to success in playing golf. Golf pro Mike Hammond told me that to play a good game of golf depended upon grip, posture, tempo, and a lot of practice. Grip, posture, and tempo are basic fundamentals and practice develops the ability to use the fundamentals over and over, producing a quality game. Life and business are the same as golf. There are basic fundamentals that must be learned and then practiced consistently.

Early in my business career I was told proper practice produces pleasing performance. Another concept I was exposed to was that “People don’t plan to fail, they just fail to plan.” So then planning is an important ingredient in any life success. Planning in golf is the grip, posture, and tempo that then must be practiced. In golf, as in life or business, not everyone has the discipline to stay with the plan, practice, and ultimately be successful. Not everyone has the same ability or level of accomplishment. Only a small percentage of those starting to golf ever score lower than 100 strokes, even fewer break 90 for 18 holes, and a very small number become par (or scratch) golfers. Just as two people can take the same golf equipment and the same instruction and get far different results, two people can get the same training in the same organization and end up with differing performance records.

The goal then should be maximizing our skills to get the most we can from golf, business, or life. Accomplishing this goal of excelling is dependent upon continuing the fundamentals. Planning and practicing are just the beginning. An equally important concept is having the focus to remain with the task no matter how the early results go. When the plan doesn’t work out adjustments must be made. In golf it is called “the rub of the green.” You hit a good shot and it takes a bad bounce. Life can sometime give us the same. We do things right and it just doesn’t happen. Keeping our eye upon the goal and continuing to move toward it is important. As has been said, “ the race doesn’t always go to the fastest, or the strongest, but to the one that keeps running.” Remember Aesop’s fable of the hare and the tortoise. Insurance millionaire W. Clement Stone had it right, “success is achieved by those who try and keep trying.”

Leading When Times Are Difficult

It seems nearly impossible that this column begins my fourth year of sharing my thoughts in “It’s Business… and more.” Shortly after I began, the whole U.S. economy seemed to go South with bailouts, stimulus packages, and bad news dominating the headlines. During these difficult times good leadership becomes even more important. Writer Max DePree states that the first duty of the leader is to define reality. The leader must carefully assess where their people are and then take them where they need to go.

In a storm people often retreat and wait for the storm, often denying reality. When times are bad the leader needs to show the way in higher, not lower, levels of activity. Bad times and low performance often lead to a lack of confidence and a resulting shrinking in self-worth. The leader must show he or she still believes in them. It must be a sincere belief and the leader must remember that you cannot give what you do not have.

The leader must instill a sense of what can be! Tough times bring out the importance of relationships. We need each other even more in difficult times. It is important to pool our resources and be more interdependent than independent. We must share and give rather than just take and hoard. Teamwork becomes even more important as we work through difficulties. The leader must guard and watch their attitude and monitor and guide the attitudes of subordinates. Our attitude is our greatest asset or our greatest liability. It is not what happens to us but what happens in us that makes a difference. Everyone has adversity it is how it is faced that makes a difference.

An important question is “What are you learning during this time.” We tend to think of our losses or gains when what we are learning from difficulties is much more important. How is what I’ve learned changing me? How can what I’ve learned help others? If we don’t learn we stay down longer and often go through the same or similar difficulties. Our role as a leader is to help others get up and get it going again. In difficult times some do well and some don’t, why is that? The ones that do well have learned and adjusted. As leaders we can help give others courage to get up and go again. Like someone has said “I’m never down, I’m either up or I am getting up.” So then, when things go bad we can help others “pick themselves up, dust themselves off, and start all over again.”

When Things Slide, Pull them Aside

My last column covered one of the real pleasures of dealing with people- finding them performing well. Unfortunately things don’t always go well and people don’t always perform well. When performance falters, dealing with the problems takes completely different actions than when things are going smoothly. When poor work is observed it needs to be corrected privately. It also needs to be done in as positive a manner as possible. You wouldn’t want to be corrected and humiliated in front of your peers and neither would they. Remember, when things slide, pull them aside.

One of the first priorities is to show them you care. If you have effectively dealt with their good work the task is much easier. Sincere positive feedback for good performance earns the right to deal with poor performance. They will know you are in it to help them rather than trying to put your thumb down on them. As much as possible let them choose their path to better performance. Get them to think of how it might be better handled after the problem is explained. Using this method makes it a more personal solution and has a much better chance for long term solution. If they become stumped for an avenue of correction you can make suggestions or give them examples to get their thoughts flowing.

Another area of concern for the manager is employees developing bad habits. Whether it’s habitual lateness, excessive use of company time for personal issues, or any number of other possible infractions, poor habits must be addressed. First, don’t beat around the bush about the issue. If they’re continuously late, restate the time for reporting to work. If they aren’t required to meet the rules soon others will follow their example and eventually chaos will reign. Next, while it is important to be direct, also be gentle. Where possible, state the “why” of the rule their bad habit is breaking. Maybe they haven’t seen the importance of being there at 8:00 rather than 8:15 or 8:30.

The final issue in dealing with poor habits is to be aware of sidetracks. They will often try to change the subject and must be brought back to the point at hand and resolution. In the video “The Practical Coach” one of the best methods for dealing with poor performance or poor habits is referred to as “the 2 minute Challenge.” The Challenge goes like this: a. State what you’ve observed b. Wait for a response c. Remind them of the goal d. Ask for a specific solution e. Agree together Used properly the challenge keeps things focused and headed toward correction. It also reminds them once again that what they do matters to you.

Say it Often, Say It Loud

When Bill Medley became Superintendent of Schools in USD 465 one of the first things I remember hearing from him was his mantra, “Find them doing something good!” The first time I heard him say that it seemed a little corny, but through the years I have come to understand the slogan’s truth and wisdom. Sincere encouragement in almost any form is as close to a silver bullet as there is in human relations. Using encouragement in the workplace is paramount in achieving lasting success.

In the video “The Practical Coach” the leader is challenged to “when you see it say it” concerning the employee observed doing good work. I would add: say it often, say it loud. Let others know when good work is happening. Doing so commends the employee and sets a pattern for others. What is said also is important. Just saying “good work” is better than nothing, but letting the employee know what you liked about their performance assures repetition. Failing to be timely in recognizing good work can lead to a sense of lack of appreciation. Too much is better than not enough in the case of kind words of praise.

Be careful that the praise is sincere and specific. The purpose is not to flatter but to commend and show appreciation. The words reinforce behavior and help give the employee a sense of belonging and meaningful contribution to the task. In reality, coaching or leading is no more than letting people know that what they do matters to you. When we let them know about good work, they sense we care and have taken time to notice them. When we are silent we may send an unintentional message that we are disinterested or that what they are doing is of little importance to us. It remains important to have consistent dialogue with them.

Often in employee surveys a missing ingredient is the employee knowing what is expected and how they are performing. Performance evaluations given once or twice a year are important, but lack time relevance. The delay contributes to the overall perception of a lack of effective communications within an organization. By the time formal evaluations are given there is little recollection of the commended (or criticized) events. It is important that the leader or coach never lets good work go unnoticed so it will become a sequence of successful events.

Producing Great Work!

While reading the account of the Jewish people rebuilding their walls in the Old Testament books of Ezra and Nehemiah it occurred to me that all great works have several key elements. In order to produce a great work we must have focus, set goals, stay committed, persevere, and be flexible. The closer we stick to and apply these elements, the sooner we will produce a great work. Without following the steps we risk delay or even failure in reaching the desired result. Early in my sales career I was told “the things we focus on get done.” Any great work begins with deciding exactly what we are trying to accomplish. Many times the decision of what we want is more difficult than the task. When we get distracted it takes much longer than if we were to stay focused.

Once we get focused on what we want, goals must be set to reach each step toward fulfillment. The goals must be specific in nature and must be put in writing. Being both specific and in writing are great aids in remaining focused. Without the goals much time, assets, and effort can be wasted.

Once we have focused and set goals we must stay committed to the task. We must adopt the attitude that “a task worth starting is one worth completing.” A work not worth committing completely to should have been eliminated earlier and time not wasted. A wise man once said “the good things are the enemies of the best things because of lack of time.”

If we can’t commit to the idea we must move on to something we can commit ourselves to. Norman Albright once told me “No one has endurance like the man that sells insurance.” If that is true then it has been an asset for me in persevering in my plans. All kinds of distractions will come along. Some are urgent and must be taken care of while others must be cast aside. Other distractions will be important and cause short detours in our plans. In short order we must get back on the track that leads to project completion.

The final element in producing a great work is equally as important as the first four. Flexibility is a key to working out a successful conclusion to our plans. Seldom does a project go exactly the way it was envisioned. We must use judgment in what must stay in order to keep the integrity of a project and what may be given up in order to meet costs or other constraints. It will be worth it when the project is successful and we can feel the accomplishment of a job well done.

"Do overs" don't always happen!!

Most of us have benefited from time to time by being given a second chance. Something just didn’t go right when we first tried and then a door opened to give us another chance. We have heard all types of stories of failures turning into success. Our lives are much richer because people tried again and saw positive results. Even though second chances are great there at least three things that we don’t always get “do overs.” Time is something we don’t get a second chance at. We all have twenty- four hours in our day to get things done and we never see that time again. I remember hearing that as you get older time goes faster. I never understood how that could be, but as I get older I do experience how time moves by.

Our words are another area that we often don’t get another chance. Sometimes we say things in way that we might hold the words until we’ve thought of them more. Whether the words are oral or written we should think them through. Sometimes our words can get us into serious problems and take longer to resolve than it would have taken to think them through in the first place, Years ago our insurance agency was having a problem with one of our companies. I wrote a terse letter to an executive and as a consequence we had our contract cancelled. We had been thinking of discontinuing our association with the company so not much was lost, however I learned a valuable lesson. One of my partners advised that I should write the letter, put it away for three days in order to think about it , then get it out, and send it if I still wanted to. Great advice!

Opportunity is also an area where we may not have another chance. When he was preparing me to be a sales manager my mentor Paul Hutsey told me that preparation and opportunity usually don’t happen at the same time. He counseled me to always be improving myself so that when the opportunity I wanted presented itself I would get ample consideration. Over the last forty years I have found his wisdom to be very important as career opportunities unfolded. Sometimes opportunities get past us because we have the wrong attitude about them. They come disguised as problems and we fail to see the opportunity until it is too late. Former Pru Vice President Frank Astolfi called them prob-ortunnities. His view was every problem presented its own set of opportunities. Or, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. But, whatever you do, don’t let opportunity pass you by.

Know Your Audience

Effective communication is extremely important in any organization. In order to have continuously good communication it is necessary to know the audience being addressed. Each audience presents its own set of challenges. Whether the communication is written or oral becoming effective at analyzing the audience makes the communication job easier. We use different semantics and different illustrations based on the makeup and experiences of a particular audience. For example, my use of professional jargon would be different if I were speaking to an insurance group as opposed to explaining insurance principles to a college insurance class. How much do they know or need to know about the topic is also very important in crafting effective messages?More time should be spent defining and explaining terminology with the less experienced group. The amount of information needed varies greatly between the two groups.

Another important issue is what the reader or listener’s initial reaction will be to the message. Using an attention getter appropriate to the audience enhances their attention and sets the stage for good communication. Several questions are important. Will the message be seen as highly important? Is the message best delivered by you or someone else? Is a more expert opinion likely to be better received? Any communication message or method will have obstacles. What specific obstacles must be overcome to communicate with a specific person or group? When presenting to a group of mixed experiences (most are) how do I keep the interest of some without boring others? What elements of the communication will have different acceptance within the group? Is there pre-communication information that, when shared, might remove some potential obstacles? Stressing benefits in a positive way can enhance message effectiveness. The old axiom WIIFM, “what’s in it for me”, is always an important aspect when addressing any audience.

Understanding audience expectations can also help in the formulation of an effective message. Covering known positive aspects at the front sets the stage for successful communication. Trying to look at the issues from their perspective and answering known concerns help in keeping them engaged in and active in the communication. Dealing with individuals also calls for knowing as much as possible about your audience. The more you know, the better the communication possibility. What is important to them? What is their interest in the topic to being discussed? How will they react to the information you are passing on to them? In the final analysis whether it’s with a group or an individual effective communication yields more effective performance. When they understand what we want or expect they have a better chance of delivering our wishes.

Anticipating Solves Problems

So much of decision-making these days seems overly reactionary. We have a fire, and we react to it. We have another fire, and react to it. Reactionary management (business or personal) is always fighting fires and waiting for the next one. Much time and effort are wasted finding and testing solutions in a trial and error sequence. Reactionary management seems stuck cleaning up the past, while a proactive approach deals better with the present and future challenges.
Wise King Solomon wrote “there is nothing new under the sun.” Since every conceivable problem we might face has been faced before, we should become proactive rather than reactive in our decisions. Before problems come, we can use anticipation to have flexible solutions. We may be facing an issue for the first time, but we can be sure others have faced the same problem.

I have often heard complaints about history as a necessary study. Yet the person carefully watching the history of his or her business can avoid repeat mistakes. The Spanish writer Santayana wrote “Those who cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” By learning from decision history and that of past pitfalls, we can continuously form proactive solutions. People gain great levels of power when they can draw from their experiences and the experiences of others to formulate workable solutions.

When we have mastered the art of anticipation, we can even head off problems when they are lower in intensity. Having a historical perspective gives recognition of potential storms on the horizon. Personnel issues are especially critical ones to anticipate. When we know our people, we can often defuse a potentially serious problem before it explodes. One reason for reactionary decisions is the tendency to try to find someone to blame or a scapegoat for the problem. We may in reality have a solution but become more interested in looking good rather than solving the problem. The “it’s not my fault” syndrome sets in and overwhelms our ability to operate in a proactive fashion.

In the end, being proactive and learning to take initiative saves time and gets things done. Reactionary management often causes procrastination waiting for a perfect solution. A good example is in the area of recruiting. Recruiting should be a continuous process, and yet often we wait until we need someone before we start looking. If we anticipate and remain in a constant recruiting mode, we remove stress and the tendency to “settle” for less than the best potential recruit. Anticipation and being proactive help us recognize our responsibility to get things done and to get them done in a workable manner.

The Marks of Leadership

So much has been written about leadership and yet in all aspects of life having leaders is critical. Whether in government, business, schools, church, or in our families leaders are the difference in reaching goals, or falling short of attaining them. While leaders come in all shapes and sizes there are some common marks that all good leaders have shown. Certainly many items could be discussed, but we’ll just look at four of them this time.

One mark that hinders success in any endeavor is personal responsibility. Our culture seems to spawn many who simply won’t be accountable for their own actions. No matter what the topic someone or something else caused it. The old “not me” or, “it wasn’t my fault” syndrome is alive and well. Leaders take personal responsibility for their actions and for the results of those actions. Leaders also convey a sense importance in not playing the “blame game” by focusing on correcting the action and moving the project towards final success. They understand that years from now it won’t be important to remember who or what delayed the project, but just the bottom line: the final result.

A second mark of a leader is that he or she understands weakness. First, their own weakness and in turn the weaknesses of those being lead. Leaders face the fact that we all have weaknesses and can plan around them until development can soften or even remove the weakness. When a leader understands their weakness they can staff with a subordinate that can perform in that area. For example, a highly competent financial manager may need a person with marketing skills that he or she doesn’t possess. In addition, recognition of staff weaknesses gives the leader direction for training plans while at the same time showing the leader’s interest in getting to know the people individually.

Certainly an important mark of leadership is the zeal or passion they display in leading their team. Teams follow more readily when it is obvious the leader is enthusiastic about the task. The leader sets the stage and is the role model for the group. If there is a sense that the leader isn’t committed or is less than excited, even the most important tasks are doomed. Involving the team in the planning stages is one way to enhance the enthusiasm of both leader and follower.

The final and possibly the most important mark of the leader is that of encouragement. Every person, no matter how strong, has times they need an encouraging word or a small helping hand in a task seemingly overwhelming. Former USD 465 Superintendent Bill Medley always wanted to “find them doing something good.” At that time we need to say a kind word, not later when they’ve forgotten the task. First, the leader must care, and then be willing to show they care. Two very important words for a leader are “Thank you.”

The Road to Nowhere

So many in our society seem to be content or intent upon heading down the road to nowhere, so I thought I’d take the time to help them. Below are ways to be successful at being unsuccessful. In case some want to change below are some suggestions how to get on the track to somewhere.

1. Avoid having a goal You should decide exactly what it is you'd like to accomplish; then remind yourself of that goal early and often. Whatever it is, write it down, picture it and share it with anyone else who you're counting on to help you accomplish it. Your goal isn't money, but what money can do. Create goals — both short-term and long-term — then decide how much money you'll need to reach them.

2. Continue spending more than you make Tracking and categorizing your expenses with a budget is the single greatest tool you have to accomplish your money-related goals. A plan that includes what you intend to spend on things like entertainment, food, housing, etc., vs. what you actually spend allows you to fine-tune your finances and find places to save..

3. Keep relating self-esteem to possessions Although we all know that money doesn't buy happiness, very few of us act that way. Instead, we seem to go out of our way to appear successful by driving the right car, living in the right house, and wearing the right clothes.

4. Starting to save large and late rather than small and soon The best time to save is right now and in comfortable amounts. Increase amounts early and be determined to keep with the plan.

5. Paying interest to buy things that drop in value There are only two situations where paying interest makes sense. The first is when the purchase goes up in value at a rate greater than the rate of interest you're paying to finance it. Another examples might be a business loan that's going to return more (at least potentially) than it costs in interest payments.

6. Buying a new car Everyone knows that cars drop 10-20 percent before you get them home from the showroom. If you're buying a car for transportation, it doesn't have to be either new or loaded. Cars are depreciating assets: the less you spend on one the better, especially if you're borrowing money to do it.

7. Buying more house than you need or can afford Some rules of thumb say spend 25 percent of your gross income on a mortgage, regardless of what size house you really need. When you buy more square feet than you're going to actually live in, you're required to insure them, furnish them, clean them, heat them, and cool them. All of that costs money, time and some level of stress. So all that is left is for you to choose the track you want to pursue. One is easy, the other more difficult. Remember, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” Don’t try to do it all at once.

Gratitude: The Missing Ingredient

Everyone wants to be appreciated, whether a mother for all her effort or a worker for successfully completing the task. So often in the rush of getting things done we forget those having a part in the success. We take for granted the effort and then wonder why less enthusiasm is shown when we again enlist help. Leadership not only bears responsibility for getting things done, but also enlisting others in the effort. Effective leaders understand they cannot succeed by themselves.
The art of honest appreciation is important and leaders must know their staff and be aware of the specific needs of each member. In his classic book, “Leadership is An Art” Max DePree wrote “the first responsibility of a leader is to define reality, the last is to say thank you. In between the two, the leader must become a servant and a debtor.” It is in that servant attitude wrapped in the willingness to say and show thanks that a true leader shows his or her true gratitude. The workplace is not the only place that gratitude is the missing ingredient. In fact, the workplace is just a reflection of the general society.

We are, as a group, an ungrateful lot. We have more than any society in history and yet, we just want more. An example of our ingratitude is the way we receive and deal with gifts. In the past the gift was a sign of love and received with appreciation. Today, if the gift isn’t exactly what we want we return or exchange it. The spirit of the gift has died. In fact we collect lists and give gift cards because we already have so much we really need nothing. In my lifetime I have gone from taking the twenty yard hike to the outhouse and taking a bath in a metal bathtub to living in a wonderful house with indoor plumbing. However, just a week ago I found myself sitting in the dark without electricity and complaining about it. It brought back memories of coal oil lamps and dim, inconsistent lighting.

What a great life we have and how thankful we should be. We need not look far to find out how good we have it. Daily we see others less fortunate with physical or mental challenges. We have the right to live and work where we choose. We are limited only by our courage to decide what we want. We need to pause from time to time and show gratitude for all that we have been given.

Results: The Bottom Line

The measure of success in our business world and indeed our whole society is results. We are driven to accomplish tasks and in many cases strive to accomplish the results regardless of consequences. The reality is that achieving results only comes after dealing with four important principles.

First, we must realize that the great difficulty in life is not getting what we want, but deciding what we want. People change jobs, students change majors, and even couples change partners not knowing what they want and thus not seeing some favorable result. Those focused upon some goal decided have a much better chance at success and a satisfying result.

Next, once a decision is made we must decide what we are willing to give or give up in order to gain what we say we want. We may have to spend time and/or money to get what we want. All possibilities in life come with an opportunity cost. When we choose one direction the resources used cannot be used for a different alternative. In reality, the question becomes, “how much am I willing to give to get what I say I want?”

Thirdly, we must learn to be totally responsible for the outcome at every stage. So often when problems do occur people try to shift blame and find a scapegoat. Then, if there is success they try to take more than their share of the credit. One concept I learned from a former manager is to always give credit and take blame. We exhibit how much we value others when we take this approach. At the very least we should admit our mistakes and move forward.

Finally, when the results are achieved we should share the rewards broadly and generously with those contributing to success. Sharing builds rapport and shows we value their contributions. The rewards should only be enjoyed when we have added service and value to others. When service and value are added our results tend to have longer life. Results will always be a requirement of our lives. Getting focused and understanding what we are giving up to achieve the results is important. Then taking responsibility for our actions and sharing the successes make the achievements more meaningful.

Times a Wastin"

I remember my Grandmother using that phrase years ago. At the time I didn’t understand what she meant. Years later I realized she was talking about just letting time slip by and not having anything to show for the time spent. Over the years I’ve come to call activities that rob us of our time “timewasters.” When we control these activities we enhance our ability to be productive and make good use of our time.

First, most of us have a tendency to spread ourselves too thin. We often try to do too much and end up with unfinished tasks. We must learn to set priorities in order to get the important tasks of the day completed.

Secondly, and related is the need to learn to delegate. It isn’t necessary ( or even possible) for us to do everything ourselves. We can have things done by others. This frees up time for our most important tasks and also develops confidence in those working with us.

Next, many of us find it very hard to say no. We get over our heads and spin our wheels at all our activities. No can be the most important word we have. It is important to do what we must do, the important items. After this we should then do what we want to do. After these two we should say no to other requests.

Still another time waster is being tied to the phone. One only need go to the store or a public activity and find people seemingly permanently attached to a cell phone. These are great tools, used properly, of communication. However, I suspect not all calls are of important nature and thus timewasters. A friend of mine bunches his calls and has a time each day to respond. The rest of his business day he works effectively and organizes his important tasks.

Our final timewaster is procrastination. We visited about this one earlier. Most of us never conquer the big P, we just win small battles from time to time. My limited success with procrastination has been to do unpleasant tasks first and to divide large jobs into smaller pieces and get bits completed, thus gaining momentum to complete the project. In reality few of us will totally control all five timewasters all the time. As we seriously work at these we improve our performance and develop habits that enable us to make use of our time more and more effectively. Then we have more time for work and leisure.

Vision...A Wonderful Thing

When I was eight years old my Dad and I were riding in a car on Orient Boulevard in Wichita. At some point Dad discovered I couldn’t read the large letters on the side of the Santa Fe boxcars. We scheduled an appointment and discovered I had 20/400 vision in my left eye and 20/300 in my right eye. In the following years I wore very thick coke bottle lenses for years. They provided no peripheral vision. Eventually I was able to wear contacts, but vision without them was still poor.

In 2004 and last month I had cataract surgery and now benefit from 20/20 or near 20/20 vision. Truly vision is a wonderful thing. In the corporate world vision is also important. The ability to visualize a dream, communicate the dream to followers, and then enlist them in the vision is essential to success. Absence of any of the three vision factors leaves organizations struggling for direction in the competitive business world. The ability to visualize a dream is often muddied by lack of decisiveness. Knowing what we want is more difficult than gaining the goal itself. We must be completely committed to the vision. Someone has said, “one man after a just and right cause becomes a majority.” The passion of the vision comes before the ability to enlist others. Communication of the vision is much easier when the leader is committed. Followers can sense sincerity from those in charge. They often don’t understand the full impact of the vision, but follow because of the clarity of purpose in leadership.

The communication and enlistment go hand in hand. The more that is communicated, the more complete the enlistment in the vision. Getting people to enlist in a vision also takes strategy. Using small victories to build momentum can be very effective. Taking on too much and failing has just the opposite effect. Once small tasks are accomplished harder ones can be attempted. Success builds confidence and is very important in the early stages of implementing a vision. One of my favorite quotes is from futurist Joel Barker, “Vision without action is a dream. Action without vision is simply passing the time. Action with vision can change the world.”

Preparing for life

“One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation.” This quote from the late tennis great Arthur Ashe is a key to success in business or life in general. What we continuously prepare and practice we become confident in and ultimately achieve success. When I started my business career Prudential had sales brochures that said, “The Future Belongs to Those who Prepare for It.”

Looking back on those days, how true that statement was. The successful people I’ve met through the years, no matter what their calling, seemed always to be ready for the task before them. The preparation idea was reinforced in training meetings by the statement, “Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance.” Once my manager accompanied me on a sales interview and after I butchered the interview badly he offered some sage advice, “adlibs are for amateurs.” Once again the importance of preparation had been illustrated.

Years earlier my 5th grade teacher, Pearl Alexander, had given her classes lessons in preparation for life in at least three areas. First, she taught us the importance of good penmanship. We worked regularly on cursive writing and the importance of neatness in our writing. She would cringe today if she could see my current writing quality, especially when I am hurried. Next, she had an uncanny ability to teach basic mathematical fundamentals. Daily she did math drills with multiplication tables and other concepts. She had each of us exhibit our skills at the blackboard until we were confident and in doing so instilled ability to understand numbers and their relationship to each other. Lastly, and most importantly, she challenged us to look for important concepts learned in our activities. Once we had identified these concepts she had us think about how we might use the ideas learned. These were preparations that would benefit and follow me throughout life. So often in life we aren’t confident or are unsure of our ability to perform a task. Often these feelings come from lack of preparation on our part. In the end we all need to keep in mind the old Boy Scout motto, “Be prepared!”

Getting From Here to There

In February I reach a milestone I didn’t think would ever come. I become full Social Security age, old double six. Back in the late ‘60’s I remember how far away my “there” seemed (it was 65 in those days). Now my “there” has managed to come and I’ve given thought to some of the ideas that seemed to work for me. Hopefully, some of you in the “here” can fit them in your own way and help to achieve your future financial goals.

1. Find work you enjoy. Confucius said, “Find a job you enjoy and you’ll never work a day in your life.” While any work has its frustrations and bad moments, doing something you enjoy and that is meaningful to you, makes those trials worth it. Over the last half of my life my work has been more like a hobby than work, a true blessing.

2. Pay yourself second. I know. I know. All the books say pay yourself first. As a conservative Christian I feel my first responsibility is to support the local church I’ve chosen to join and also their worldwide ministries. Then pay yourself. Early in my career I was introduced to a pamphlet, “The Richest Man in Babylon.” He became rich by setting aside ten percent of all his growth to take care of his future.

3. Stop and smell the coffee. Many financial plans fail because people forget to also enjoy themselves along the way. In elementary school I remember the old axiom “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” All saving and no enjoyment of our labor eventually frustrates us and we end by throwing up our hands and giving up. Take time to enjoy the journey from “here” to “there.”

4. Understand adjustments must happen. Plans seldom happen exactly the way we set them. We must be flexible. My original plan included retiring from Prudential at age 60, I left the company at age 52. Things needed to be adjusted. Incomes change, families change, obligations change, and we must change with them.

5. Pay it forward. Never get so focused on the plan that it becomes all about you. One of life’s greatest purposes is in helping and meeting the needs of others. Some of my fondest moments were on the board of USD 465, trying to improve education of our children. The eternal law of sowing and reaping always works, its eternal. You can never give more than you’ll get back. Often the payment is in the satisfaction in seeing the results of being generous.

Five Rules to Live By

In mid-December I took my Mother to visit her wound doctor in Wichita. While waiting I noticed a little wall plaque titled “Rules to Live By.” No credit for the ideas was given, but the lesson to me was clear, these were rules we can all benefit from in the New Year and beyond.

1. Never give up! As I read this I thought of one of Winston Churchill’s greatest and shortest speeches to a graduating class. The late British Prime Minister’s speech was a mere nine words. “Never give up! Never give up! Never give up! What great advice as we start a new year. We all start a project or have an idea, only to finally move on leaving unfinished what was started with enthusiasm.

2. Be nice to one another. Our mothers tried to show us this from childhood. Nice begets nice. Honey attracts better than vinegar. Yet, in our self-focused society we leave this practice and buy into “I must look out for myself, no one else will.”

3. Think good thoughts. James Allen, in his classic book “As A Man Thinketh” taught that our thoughts construct our actions, so good thoughts are necessary to yield good results. We spend too much time thinking why we can’t rather than why we can.

4. Try to do better. Whatever the behavior, we can make an effort to do better. Often we try to change too much, when small improvements over time would be more successful. The Japanese have the concept of “kaizen,” or small, continuous improvement that we could use to help us do better.

5. Say please and thank you. The word “please” softens an order to a request and gets a much more willing response. “Thank you” helps convey a sense of appreciation that reinforces the behavior. I can remember my wife telling our girls, “Say please,” now say “thank you.” It was and still is great advice. These five rules, practiced regularly, will bring more friends, increase customer satisfaction, and generally give us a happier life. They really expand from “The Golden Rule,” that we should “do unto others as we would have them do unto us.”

To Get Things Done...Prioritize!!

We all have so many activities going on it seems like sometimes we just spin our wheels. The things we want to do often conflict with the things we need to do. Often we choose the pleasant activities and then run out of time for what we really need to get done. Several years ago I heard a statement that “the good things are the enemies of the best things because of lack of time.”

There are all kinds of choices we can make, but we do have limits on our time. Each of us must decide what’s important and place those items at the front. In his classic book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” Stephen Covey talks at length about “Putting First Things First.” Covey calls some tasks important and others urgent. Often the urgent get in the way of the important. While in the short term we must deal with urgent issues, long term success demands consistently being effective at our important issues. An example of an urgent issue would be discovering I have a flat tire and also have an appointment in Wichita in two hours. The tire must be fixed! One hour has been lost to an urgent need.

Absent the crisis I might have taken care of an important activity, such as preparation for my 8:00 class. Now I must shuffle my schedule and prioritize my time in reaction to the events of the day. Each day and week has its own scheduling adventures. We make our plans, set our priorities, and then remain flexible. The importance of prioritizing is that when our schedule falls apart we know the important tasks still needing attention. One last important topic in prioritizing is knowing when to work and when to play. Our society seems to get the greatest joy out of watching overpaid athletes play their games. While they succeed (at least monetarily) we become couch potatoes, often putting off much more important activities, such as actually having a conversation with each other.

I have discovered that there is more to life than sports. Rather than spend six hours watching NFL football, I spend 10-15 minutes seeing all the highlights on ESPN. That choice on my part leaves over five hours in my Sunday to share with my wife. We can have both activities by deciding what is important and prioritizing. In recent years my sports watching activities have been mainly confined to Southwestern College athletic events, mainly basketball. This started when I had several student athletes in classes and my wife and I began attending. Soon the events became family events with from one to four of my grandchildren attending with us. These became double-duty events as I enjoy the games and get to share them with our grandchildren. One activity didn’t have to give way to another, they just became blended.

Practice Your Practice!!

I had always heard the old axiom “practice makes perfect.” It sounded good, but then a wise man told me that “perfect practice makes perfect.” If we practice a bad habit or method we will never be as good as we could be. Either way, to become and remain good at what we do we must practice. Whether we are I sales, education, medicine, or any other field we must put to work the fundamentals of our chosen field. I don’t know how many times I’ve heard or overheard someone say “I wish I could ………as well as you can.

I remember thinking that about someone with great skill at the piano. I proved unwilling to put the time in to build a the skill. It seems like we think there should be a magic pill to take. There is! The magic pill is hard work and staying with the task of developing, then with the task of maintaining. Several years ago my manager accompanied me on some sales calls and interviews. At the end of the day, when I had wandered aimlessly from idea to idea, he simply said, “adlibs are for amateurs.” At that moment, I committed to never entering any project without being prepared.

People that commit to practicing the fundamentals tend to win. I heard a member of the 1983 Super Bowl Champion Washington Redskins say that Coach Joe Gibbs was fanatical about execution of the fundamentals. Blocking and tackling drills over and over until the techniques were mastered. We all have practices, repeated often, that lead to high skill levels. As we see teams succeed and others fail there is often only a small difference, just a small margin. Three years ago the Southwestern men’s basketball team had an 18-12 record, losing five games by 1-3 points, while making about 60% of their free throws. A 67% success spread out over those games would have yielded 3-5 more victories. Free throws are just a small fundamental, but a very important one when the game is close. It’s easy to focus on sensational looking dunks or three point shots, but many games are won or lost at the one point line.

In sports, or business, or life in general it all comes down to a famous saying, “Anything worth doing is worth doing well.” In his classic book “Think and Grow Rich” author Napoleon Hill talks about the three tenets of what he called The Law of Compensation. According to Hill we are ultimately compensated based upon the need for the work we do, our ability to perform the work, and the difficulty the employer would have in replacing us. Two of those three tenets are directly affected by our commitment to “practicing our practice.”