The Power of "No"

According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary the definition of the word “no” is“ used as a function word to express the negative of an alternative choice or possibility.” Rather a simple definition of one of the smallest, and yet, one of the most powerful words in our English language. We use and misuse this word on a regular basis so we’ll take this time to visit about “the power of no."

Several years ago when I was in Wichita one of my agents came forward with a request I knew couldn’t be complied with so I told him no. In the next few weeks he would alter the request slightly and come back repeatedly. After several encounters I replied “what part of no don’t you understand?” Years later when Lorrie Morgan recorded the song “What Part of No “ I felt I might have missed a great opportunity! Truth is my agent understood “no” he just didn’t want to accept that answer.

One of the real powers of the word no is to know when to use it and then sticking by the decision. Parenting is one of the places where misuse of the word occurs regularly. We can vary from saying no too often to saying no and having our children work their way to yes by playing their parents against each other. At other times children just use the method of keeping at it until they get their way.

When we moved to Winfield in 1976 I had a brand new experience. I had never been involved in a community before and soon found myself member of many civic organizations. All were good, but ultimately I had to learn to limit myself by invoking the power of no. The process took some time but eventually I could balance work, family, church, and community involvement. No had become my friend.

In sales one of the biggest obstacles to overcome is the fear of rejection. Trainers try to remove or reduce this fear by convincing sales people the customer is not rejecting them, but they are rejecting the product. However, the sting of “no” would still remain.

My mentor Paul Hutsey had the most convincing take on dealing with no. He regularly would remind us that with every no we were closer to the next yes. So then we could handle the noes while working toward the yeses that would spell success. That idea fit well with his basic concept that to be successful in sales we had to be willing to fail (take no) 90% of the time. The worst thing that could happen is not to ask because then nothing will happen. When you ask the door of possibility opens for the next yes!